tisdag 26 februari 2013

The solace of Battlefield

So, I've been really busy at work, because I've got a new job and I've needed to finish up things at the old one. And I've been needing my sleep. Plus, I've been watching the whole Buffy -series, again. And Battlefield just had to go. I've been playing maybe once a week this last month. Which is probably more normal than playing every single night.

But when I do get back in the game, it's the same as always. This is my rush and my comfort.

I don't know if it's ADHD or just my personality, but I have an extreme need for input. I mean I really need to process information at all times, as long as I'm awake, or I get rather anxious and stressed out. I read, watch, listen to everything, all the time. And I get these hangups, like the idea that I should learn everything there is to know about shintoism, or hedgehogs or airplanes or whatever. And then I do, until I lose interest because something else grabbed me. So in a sense I'm often scattered, torn between interests, between different kinds of stimuli. And I'm in many respects a Jack of all trades, master of none. Life is rather loud and colorful to me and I exhaust myself trying to process everything.

But Battlefield is peace and quiet. It gives me input every single microsecond and I don't need to think about anything else. It's like being in the eye of the storm. It excites me by demanding much and makes me strangely calm at the same time. When I play by myself I prefer Close Quarters. The faster, the better. The more input, the calmer I get. The more hectic a game gets, the more I feel relieved of all my stress. I'm sure I'm not alone in this.

I suppose it could be a bad thing, like a drug. But if this is a drug it's the perfect one,  because it doesn't make me slow or dull or speeded or psychotic. It doesn't get in the way of other things. So I'm perfectly happy being a BF junkie.

And I guess it's me and the fps:es forever and ever. Can't wait for BF4...and the PS4.

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